Personality Zone

Ode to the Guardian

You

You are my mother
You are my father
You are my stepfather
You are my halfsister
You are my mother-in-law
You are my father-in-law
You are my brother-in-law
You are my sister-in-law
You are my grandmother
You are my grandfather and perhaps 
You will be my child
You are my next door neighbors
You are my husband's clients
You are the lady that stopped that check behind our backs that put our account in the red
You are the bank teller that didn't do much about it
You are the guy that makes going to work for my aunt a living hell
You are the woman that loves to feed me and take care of my dogs
You are my best friend
You are another friend's husband
You are everywhere
You don't perceive nor have much intuition generally speaking
You don't think much more than five minutes in front of  your face unless your planning something and then it's in terms of what could go wrong and how worrying about it now will somehow stop it from happening
You don't let me own my feelings
You don't let me express myself
You don't let me be me
You think people are only worthy according to your standards for contribution toward the world and I have to say world and not universe because 
You don't beleve there is anything other than this unless
You believe in God and then it's just about justifying your tireless rule-making by saying 'well the bible says...'
You make my breakfast and then you tell me I'm eating rudely
You yell at me to tell me not to yell
You are so happy that I am pregnant but even though I am a woman just as you are, you will not trust that I can raise my own child well
You are my least inspiring teachers, the one that made me do lines for yawning and the one who made us copy the blackboard for hours instead of just giving us copies
You are one of my school headmasters, the one that wouldn't let us wear make-up or earrings or anything individualizing to school
You are the woman who said 'if you tried harder maybe it could have been an A+ instead of just an A'
You are the man that forces my friend to relinquish her indepence and be a homemaker so you can come home to a clean house and food on the table
You are The Man
You are the building inspector who makes it his job to find all the things that need to be fixed for good standards of safety and then you will make up some more so that the city can get more money through countless permits and charges
You are the majority of the population
You get upset or angry easily and you can hold it as a grudge for a lifetime although 
You can be very kind
You think you like people because you like the idea that you are a people-person really it seems as though 
You just like regulating them or serving them or visiting them because that is what is socially awarded
You think you are the authority on everything you know anything about and get intimidated or turn off if someone knows more than you about a subject and simply deem that subject  or the person talking about it impractical and useless 
You spend hundreds on groceries but wait until you're fifty before you get a dishwasher
You have children but you don't tolerate them and 
You will feed their bodies but not their souls
You are the status quo 
You are static
You despise change unless it's replacing the toilet seat
You are the anti-evolution
You won't even understand or try to understand that statement
You see a world that is so small
You teach me many things and I appreciate that but I WOULD BE TERRIFIED TO BE ANYTHING LIKE 
YOU!!!!!